Pregnancy and Infant Loss and Remembrance Day.

I have been blessed with 4 biological children and a stepson. My 2 youngest were anything but typical pregnancy and I am lucky for them to be here. Today is the day I get to remember my babies that are gone. I have miscarried 3 times and each time was devastating. My first was May of 2005. At 10 weeks we saw a heartbeat but when we went back at 12 weeks the baby had stopped growing. My second one was March 1998 this was a surprise baby. I was 13 weeks and his heart stop beating. My third one was the hardest. I went in for blood test every other day to make sure everything was good. They notice that my levels were extremely high and suspected twins. I have never been so sick in my life with morning sickness. I went in for my ultrasound and all they saw was a empty sac. They wanted to do a d and c but I refused. My blood levels kept going up and I was sure that my next ultrasound would show us a baby. After three weeks of out of control hcg levels and only slight growth in the ultrasounds I decided to get the d and c. I had a partial molar pregnancy. It took 6 months for my blood levels to go down and they went in with a second d and c because they thought some could of been left. After that experience I was scared to try again.